'I'd quake in my seat': Sonia Gandhi recalls Indira Gandhi's temper, early days as bride in memoir

NewsIndia News'I'd quake in my seat': Sonia Gandhi recalls Indira Gandhi's temper, early days as bride in memoir 'I'd quake in my seat': Sonia Gandhi recalls Indira Gandhi's temper, early days as bride in memoir Edited by Abhishek Mishra / TIMESOFINDIA.COM / Updated: Nov 10, 2026, 14:20 IST NEW DELHI: A staffer made to stand in a corner, a senior Congress leader ordered to face the wall and another person ignored for days.

Indira Gandhi had different ways of dealing with those who triggered her “occasional explosions of temper”, Sonia Gandhi writes in her recently released memoir, recalling her early days as a bride in the Nehru-Gandhi family.In her much-anticipated memoir, Belonging: A Journey of Love, the senior Congress leader offers a glimpse into the temperament of the former prime minister and her mother-in-law, describing how her sudden outbursts could leave even those around her visibly shaken.The 544-page book, published by HarperCollins India, traces the arc of Sonia's life, from her childhood in post-war Italy and marriage into the Nehru-Gandhi family to the assassination of her husband, Rajiv Gandhi, and her eventual entry into politics.Also Read| What made Sonia Gandhi turn down PM post after UPA’s 2004 victory?

Memoir revisits moment“What I found most alarming was my mother-in-law's occasional explosions of temper. They could freeze the staff into numbness,” she writes.Recalling one such incident, Sonia says a staff member who had repeatedly forgotten to remind Indira of an important appointment was made to stand in a corner of the room as others hurriedly moved around him, visibly embarrassed.In another instance, she came across a “kurta-dhoti-clad individual standing immobile in the corner, staring at the wall”.

“I was not yet familiar with who was who in the political pantheon, but the fact that he was within our private space signalled that he must have been a Congress Party senior,” she writes.Sonia recalls spending nearly half an hour with Amie Aunty, a senior member of Indira's staff, before returning to find the man still standing in the same position.Also Read| 'Should've called it Whitewashing, not Belonging': BJP mocks Sonia Gandhi's memoir“When I walked back, the man in white was still stuck to the wall as ordered by my mother-in-law, I learnt later,” she writes.Indira also had another way of expressing her displeasure: Refusing to acknowledge someone altogether.

Sonia says there were occasions when the former prime minister would ignore an “offending individual”, leaving them in suspense for days.Her temper could also flare up at the dining table, particularly after a “particularly unpleasant exchange with the opposition” in Parliament.

On one such occasion, Indira pushed her thali to the other side of the long dining table in a “fit of anger”.Sonia says these outbursts unsettled her, reminding her of her own father's temper. While she would feel perturbed and shaken, Rajiv and his younger brother Sanjay would sit quietly, waiting for the moment to pass.Rajiv would often reassure her: “Don't let yourself get so scared.

She'll be all right in no time.”But such assurances did little to ease her anxiety in the early days of the marriage.“But until I got to know her well, I'd quake in my seat,” Sonia writes.She adds that Indira would usually regret her outbursts and find ways to communicate her remorse to those she had upset.

However, she was far less forgiving when she felt a colleague had betrayed her trust.“She'd distance herself and not ever deal with that person again,” Sonia recalls.Indira's love for old photographs, sarees and shawls Beyond her moments of anger, Sonia also describes the domestic routines through which Indira found comfort and relaxation.One of her favourite activities was asking Amie Crishna to bring out boxes of old photographs, which she would then carefully sort by date.

At other times, she would take out her sarees and, with the family's help, arrange them according to their provenance, attaching tags to each bundle for easy access.She would also set aside sarees that she had worn only occasionally but which were still in good condition, asking the family to make separate bundles for different relatives.Join conversation InsightfulAgreeDisagreeSkepticalConcerningPromisingWorth ReadingBig Development Sonia also writes about Indira's fondness for sarees and old Kashmiri shawls, including several treasured sarees that had belonged to her mother from the pre-khadi period.The frequency of Indira's “tense moments” gradually declined after she became a grandmother.As her grandchildren grew older, they would often be sent to gauge her mood before approaching her.

Their presence, Sonia writes, had a calming effect on the former prime minister.“A smile or an innocent question from her grandchildren at once melted her; they helped her to relax and provided much contentedness,” she writes.

Get the latest India News and Live updates. Download the TOI app. Abhishek Mishra is a Digital Content Producer at The Times of India, working with the news desk. He writes with a keen eye on foreign policy, defence developments, and the shifting currents of geopolitics-and yes, Indian politics always finds a way onto his radar too.

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